Two Walking As One

Two Walking As One



I remember how fascinated I was many years ago, when I saw a movie which had morphing in it. (For those who do not know it, morphing is when one picture is gradually changed until it becomes another picture. Like turning a man into a woman, or a man into the face of an animal). I thought it was so clever that they could take a character and change them into someone completely different, and make it look as though it was happening in front of your eyes.



Marriage is similar to a morph - but there is a difference here. You are not changing one thing into another. You are morphing two things together to make a completely different picture! You are taking a husband and a wife as two separate people, and you are blending them into one complete, new person.



This is what you should be aiming for, whether you have been married for only a short while, or for many years. The two of you should become so one that you begin to say the same things or think the same things at the same time.



You might be thinking, “Oh boy, how is that possible? We’re completely different!”



Don’t worry, it is very possible! I’ll show you shortly how you can begin to make this happen. It is actually very easy! There is just one way that it will always succeed, and that is for both of you to work at it. So I want to encourage you to both do this, and you will begin to see the oneness starting to happen.



It Can Take Time



There is just one little problem. To change and become one doesn’t happen instantly or overnight. It sometimes takes time for it to happen. There are sometimes little things that stand in the way of you becoming fully one, and the Lord will often have to chip away at these problems bit by bit. It is kind of like the effect that the sea has on sharp rocks. As the water keeps on crashing over the rocks, they begin to bump against each other, and little by little the sharp edges begin to break off.



This is what will begin to happen to you as you both look to the Lord to make you one. He will begin by breaking off the sharp edges or the little things that stand in the way of making you one. Then He will blend you together so that you become like one person – thinking, feeling and acting the same. So don’t be discouraged if it looks like things are actually getting worse rather than better. Keep working at it and desiring to become that one person, and the Lord will make it happen. That is His part and the spiritual side. You can play a part in the natural too.



It Starts with Observation



You can speeden up the process! It starts by being aware of your spouse. Start by being observant. Watch your husband or wife closely and see how they react to certain things, what they like or dislike, what upsets them or makes them happy. You should be like a private investigator who has to pick up important data that other people often miss. Listen carefully to your spouse as they talk, and after a while you will begin to know what they would say and how they would say it.



It amazes me to see some marriages where the husband and wife have no idea what is going on in each other’s lives! They are simply like two people living in the same house, but they are so busy with their own lives they know nothing about their spouse and what they are like. They are two people each on their own agendas who happen to like each other - hopefully. Aside from that, there is no unity and no knowledge of the other person. How are you ever going to become one if you don’t know your husband or wife well?



When Les and I first got married, this was my greatest area of failure. I was so unobservant! I think I was kind of like what Jesus said to His disciples in Mark 8:18:



Having eyes, do you not see? And having ears, do you not hear? And do you not remember?



I saw things happen to Les and I heard things that he spoke to me, but as fast as what it happened I forgot them, and got side-tracked with other things. It’s as though they didn’t penetrate, because I was too wrapped up in my own world to be aware or become involved with what was happening to him.



It is easy to become like this and I understand how it can happen, but I want to give you a challenge today: You can change! You can become more involved in your spouse’s world. You can become a part of them and what they do, think and desire, and bring about a huge downpour of blessing at the same time. The change must start with you, and then it will flow down to your spouse.



Communicate!



The next thing to do is communicate and share everything! We’ve dealt with this in quite a few studies already, but I want to remind you again and again until it becomes so easy that you will never have a problem with it! If you can get the communication part right then every little problem, blockage or barrier can be removed by the Lord, because nothing will stand in the way! Nothing will be hidden or vague, and you will not have small misunderstandings with your spouse that can cause such big problems.



As Les has shared, you should daily both talk and share everything that is on your heart: things that you desire, your dreams and visions, problems that you are experiencing, even if they seem small. If your spouse is talking – listen! You should be like a sponge that just soaks up every little drop of what they are saying. Then try and remember or be aware of everything that they have said. How else will you know what is happening in your spouse if you don’t take an interest? How else will you be able to meet his or her needs if you don’t do this?



Keys to Becoming One



Now you can join your heart to your husband or wife and stand with them. As you know all the things that your spouse has shared, you can stand on the promise of the Word that says, “Where two or more agree on anything, it shall be done by my Father in heaven.” You will often need that power of agreement with your spouse. You can also begin to flow in faith, hope and love with them. Here is a quick summary of how you can do this:



Faith: Whatever your spouse is desiring or praying about – join him or her in it. Pray for the same things. Agree with them and join your faith with theirs. You can pray together or separately – it doesn’t matter. The important thing is to be praying in the same direction. Then just trust the Lord to bring the answers in His way and His timing.



Hope: You need to expect the answer and not settle for anything less! See the Lord giving your spouse that answer. Imagine it and keep that picture in your mind continually, and it will happen at the right time. Then you can both rejoice and get excited about the answer.



Love: Continue to love your spouse unconditionally, whether they love you back or not. They may be under pressure or going through a hard time, and they may ignore you or snap at you. I know that this is hard to accept if it happens, but it won’t last. Your love will work on your spouse like a sharp sword or a powerful laser beam, and the Lord will bring about the changes that are needed.



So now, what do you have here? You have two people who are both walking along the road as one. They are walking in the same direction, thinking in the same way and desiring the same things. As you are standing with your spouse, remember that he or she is standing with you too in your desires and plans. United in this way, nothing can stand against you and Satan cannot separate you! You will also become a mighty tool that the Lord can use for His Kingdom!



Blessings,



_____________

Daphne Crause