Jumat, 10 Oktober 2014

It's Not About the Money


It's Not About the Money

by Dr. Gary Chapman

Many of the conflicts I hear in my counseling office are focused on money: "He could get a better job if he would just try," or "All I ask is that she records the checks she writes — balancing our checkbook is a nightmare!" These are the kind of verbal spears that couples throw at each other when they can't agree.
Frequently, financial conflicts focus on how each spouse handles money, and blaming each other for not having enough money. Each spouse has logical reasons for his or her opinions, and couples often argue for years about the same issues without resolution. It's essential to understand that most arguments about money are really not about money. They grow out of a failure to understand each other's needs and to respect each other's personalities.
To resolve a fight over money, we must search beneath the surface of the conflict to discover the physical, emotional and spiritual needs that motivate the way we handle money. Behavior motivated by physical need is probably the easiest to understand. Say I'm driving and suddenly become thirsty. I start looking for a store to buy a bottle of water. My wife says, "Why would you buy water when we can get free water at my mom's house in 30 minutes?" My behavior (buying water) is motivated by thirst (a physical need). On the other hand, my wife's response is motivated by an emotional or spiritual need, which may be much harder to recognize. Understanding these hidden needs is crucial if we're going to understand each other.
6 basic needs
Psychiatrist William Glasser said, "Everything we do — good or bad, effective or ineffective, painful or pleasurable, crazy or sane, sick or well, drunk or sober — is to satisfy powerful forces within ourselves." This was Glasser's way of saying that even inappropriate behavior is serving some function. In some distorted way, such behavior is meeting an emotional or spiritual need.
I'm using the words emotional and spiritual to describe those nonphysical needs that so profoundly affect our inner sense of well-being. The closer we come to understanding the internal motivation of our spouse's behavior, the more likely we are to find a resolution to our differences in the financial arena.
Let me describe six of the inner needs that influence the way we handle money:
The need to love and be loved. People feel good about themselves when helping others. It's this emotional and spiritual reality that motivates someone to be charitable and altruistic.
The need for security — to provide a safe environment for life. This is what motivates people to lock doors at night and save for a rainy day.
The need for freedom. None of us desires to be controlled by our spouse, so our behavior is often motivated by our desire for freedom. When a husband says, "Don't tell me what to do!" he's expressing a feeling that his freedom has been violated.
The need for significance. Within each of us is the desire to do something bigger than ourselves, to accomplish something that will fulfill us. This need often motivates us to give to the poor.
The need for recreation or relaxation. Physically, mentally and emotionally, humans are designed with a need for rhythm of movement between work and play. This is readily observed by the fact that we invest so much time and money in play.
The need for peace with God. This is the need that underlies all others. We want to please God, and this often motivates us to give part of our income in a way that honors Him.
This isn't an exhaustive list of inner needs, but these are some of the most fundamental. If you and your spouse want to understand each other, you must ask the questions:
• What motivates my spouse's behavior?
• What needs is he or she trying to meet?
• What motivates my own behavior?
• What needs am I trying to meet?

Practical implications Now, let's make this practical. Focus on a particular financial behavior that irritates you. Perhaps your husband spends too much money attending sporting events. There's nothing wrong with being irritated if, in your opinion, you cannot afford those expenses. However, when you recognize his need for work-play balance, you are far more likely to help him meet his emotional need in a way that will not break the budget.
Let's say you're irritated that your wife wants to give more of your family income to Christian endeavors. In your opinion, you are not at a stage of life where you can afford this. However, if you understand this is motivated by a spiritual need to please God and help others, you are more likely to be understanding and supportive of her desire.
Let me encourage you to focus on one of those points of irritation and ask yourself, What is motivating my spouse to pursue this behavior? What is causing me to be irritated with my spouse's behavior? You can then focus on discovering how to meet each other's emotional and spiritual needs in an appropriate manner.
4 personalities
Another factor influencing financial conflict in marriage is what we typically call personality — our patterned way of responding to life. Looking at four common personality types can illustrate the importance of understanding each other's responses:
The peacemaker. This is the slow, easygoing, well-balanced personality. In a marriage, the peacemaker tends to ignore conflict and avoids arguments. Unfortunately, this leads to unresolved conflict. The peacemaker is typically easy to live with — until he explodes because the internal pressure becomes too much.
The controller. This is the quick, active, practical person. She tends to be self-sufficient, independent and decisive. Finding it easy to make decisions for herself, she often makes decisions for her husband as well. She does not give in to pressure, but will argue until she wins. In money management, she tends to forget that marriage is a team effort.
The caretaker. This is the self-sacrificing person who wants to meet the needs of others. His emotional nature is extremely sensitive. The caretaker finds his greatest meaning in life through personal sacrifice and service to others. The downside to this personality type is that he often gives away more than the budget allows.
The party maker. This is the warm, lively, excited personality. She enjoys people and makes life exciting for everyone. Unfortunately, this personality also finds it hard to record checks and uses the credit card with little thought of tomorrow.
Each of these personality patterns has strengths and weaknesses when it comes to money management. Although none of us fits neatly into one of these four personality patterns, we all tend to identify with one type more than the others. Do I need to mention that a husband and wife seldom have the same personality? And isn't it strange how those differences are attractive when we're dating but irritating when we're married?
A united effort
Your past efforts to resolve financial conflict have undoubtedly been influenced by your personality. If you're a peacemaker, you've probably tried to overlook the things about your spouse's money management that irritate you. You've attempted to hold your frustration inside. The sad truth is that this tendency ultimately leads to greater emotional distance between you and your spouse. When the distance becomes unbearable, you may lash out in anger. Your spouse may ask, "If you feel so strongly about this, why did you wait so long to tell me?"
Once you understand the weakness of your personality type, you can learn to express your frustrations much earlier. If your spouse understands your personality type, he or she can encourage you to express your feelings and assure you that he or she will receive them positively.
Consider making a list of the six basic needs and the four personality types, then discuss them with your spouse. The next time you experience conflict over money, use the list to help you explore why you did what you did. I think you'll agree that most of your arguments about money are really not about money after all.
You must work as a team. It's your money. As equal partners, you learn to handle money in a way that honors God, enhances your marriage and eventually allows you to be generous in helping others. After all, married life is a team effort — even where money is concerned.

Dr. Gary D. Chapman is a pastor and speaker and the author of The Five Love Languages.

This article appeared in the January/February 2014 issue of Thriving Family. Copyright © 2013 by Dr. Gary Chapman. Used by permission. ThrivingFamily.com.

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6 Cultural Trends Impacting Marriages and Families in the Church


6 Cultural Trends Impacting Marriages and Families in the Church


Dreaming womanBy Ted Cunningham
Imagine you are standing in front of the directory map at the mall. I usually start by looking for the “X” next to the words “You Are Here.” From there I find the store I want to go to. Then, I chart my course.
That is a word picture that comes to mind often as I think about church leadership. As pastors and leaders, we sometimes leave out the “We are here” part of vision casting. We love writing and delivering sermons that paint a beautiful picture of marriage and family (the destination) but at times avoid the messiness of reality (where we are now). It’s easy to pick an issue or current political topic and target that as our primary concern for the family. However, there are many cultural trends negatively impacting the family today. Let’s start with where we are.
We Are Here
This is not an exhaustive list, but these 6 marriage and family trends are challenging the church today:
  1. The Kid-centered Home – Sometime around 1980, parents shifted towards a more nurturing home. Opportunity and advantage became the foundation and priority for parenting. We want our children to have every opportunity and shot at success. I like how my friend, pastor Carey Nieuwhof, asked the question, “When does giving our child every advantage actually become a disadvantage?” Great question. With the kid-centered home came new parenting motives. We became…
     
    • Vanity parents, using our children’s attributes and accomplishments to impress others.
    • Perfection parents, setting high expectations for success in every opportunity and endeavor.
    • Competitive parents, comparing our children’s strengths and weaknesses to other children.
    • Gifted parents, picturing our children as “extra special” and seeking out “extra special” opportunities.
    • Rescue parents, hovering and helicoptering over our children shielding them from all pain, loss and trials.
    • Companion Parents, seeking friendship by elevating a child to the level of spouse or descending as a parent to the level of a sibling.
  2. Prolonged Adolescence – Biblically and historically, there are two seasons to life: childhood and adulthood. Boys became men and girls became women. In 1904, the term adolescence birthed a gap between childhood and adulthood. That gap continues to grow. My friend, Ryan Pannell, defines prolonged adolescence as too much privilege and not enough responsibility. It is an extended vacation from the responsibility required to successfully work a job and build healthy relationships. Prolonged adolescence is the direct result of the kid-centered home.
     
  3. Delayed Marriage – One result of prolonged adolescence is the delay of adulthood milestones. It keeps young adults from accepting personal responsibility for life, work and relationships. There are 5 adulthood milestones that every generation experiences: (1) Leave home (2) Finish school or training (3) Secure employment (4) Get married (5) Start a family. Until recently, generations completed those milestones in a very short period of time. I know some seniors at our church who completed those 5 milestones in less than a week. True story. In an effort to protect their future, young people hold off marriage as long as possible. We tell them, “You need to learn how to be independent before you can be successful at marriage.” Independence is the new socially acceptable term for selfishness. We raise our children in the kid-centered home only to send them off and say, “Go live by yourself and for yourself for another 10 or so years.”
     
  4. Sliding vs. Deciding – Dr. Scott Stanley from the University of Denver coined this term and it is the name of his blog (www.slidingvsdeciding.com). Couples today are sliding past the decisions of traditional relationship formation. Cohabitation is the primary example of this trend. To protect themselves, there is no definition assigned to the relationship. “Let’s just see how this works out” is the socially acceptable term for “Let’s not commit.” Dr. Stanley defines commitment as making a choice to give up all other choices. Church leaders and parents teach children to hold off decisions rather than how to make good decisions that lead to and form healthy relationships.
     
  5. Dating While Divorcing – Facebook regularly updates us on this trend. A couple you love begins to breakdown. Weeks after a separation, you see a profile picture with a new boyfriend or girlfriend (before divorce papers are even drafted). It’s difficult to fight for or reconcile in marriage when you have given your heart away to another. On top of that, the dating couple wants the support of family and friends. That is painful and difficult. We can’t, nor should we, celebrate a new relationship while we are mourning the death of the marriage. With integrity, I cannot hit the “Like” button on the new profile picture or relationship status update.
     
  6. Greying Divorce – Oh, how I wish grandma and grandpa’s marriage was safe, but it is not. The New York times brought greying divorce to our attention in 2013:

    “So much for ’till death do us part.’ For the first time, more Americans 50 and older are divorced than widowed, and the numbers are growing as baby boomers live longer. Sociologists call them gray divorcees.
    A half-century ago, only 2.8 percent of Americans older than 50 were divorced. While divorce rates over all have stabilized and even inched downward, the divorce rate among people 50 and older has doubled since 1990, according to an analysis of census data by professors at Bowling Green State University in Bowling Green, Ohio. That’s especially significant because half the married population is older than 50.
    In 1990, 1 in 10 persons who divorced was 50 or older. By 2011, according to the census’s American Community Survey, more than 28 percent (more than 1 in 4) who said they divorced in the previous 12 months were 50 or older.” (www.nytimes.com)
Where We Want to Go
One early morning when my son was 8, we watched one of my favorite pastors from California, pastor Greg Laurie. He preached from a series called Happily Even After. The message fit perfectly with what we believe about commitment in marriage and leaving a legacy and inheritance to our children. Halfway through the message, I leaned over to Carson and said, “Carson, I just want you to know something. I plan to leave you a little something when I die, but most of it will go to your mom. More than money, I’m leaving you the legacy of a mom and dad who loved each other and enjoyed life together. You’ll appreciate that way more than money.”
Singles, spouses, and parents all have a role to play in esteeming marriage as highly valuable (Hebrews 13:4). Whatever your age or season in life, we are all called to honor marriage.
One way we honor marriage is by rejoicing, delighting and praising the love of the couples around us (S of S 1:4). Do you know a couple that needs to be encouraged? Send them a note or a card praising their love. Do you know a couple in crisis? Offer them a listening ear and the help they need to save their marriage. Is there a couple that inspires you? Invite them out to dinner and tell them. Let’s all become champions and advocates for marriage.
When we honor marriage and the couples around us, we eradicate the kid-centered home and bless our children with the gift of mom and dad enjoying life together.
When we honor marriage and the couples around us, we bring our children out of prolonged adolescence and send them out of the home as an adult, not on a journey to become one.
When we honor marriage and the couples around us, we eliminate the fear and unnecessary delay of marriage in our children.
When we honor marriage and the couples around us, we form healthy relationships by making decisions that build commitment.
When we honor marriage and the couples around us, families find hope in Jesus. He breathes life into dead people and dead couples. (Let’s pray for more relationship updates on Facebook that read “Reconciled!”)
When we honor marriage and the couples around us, our senior adults will continue to be examples of commitment, loyalty, responsibility and longevity.
Copyright © 2014 by Ted Cunningham. Used by permission.

Ted Cunningham
Ted Cunningham is the founding pastor of Woodland Hills Family Church. He married Amy in 1996 and now live in Branson, MO with their two children, Corynn and Carson. Ted is the author of Fun Loving You, Trophy Child and Young and In Love and coauthor of four books with Dr. Gary Smalley. He is a graduate of Liberty University and Dallas Theological Seminary.
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Faith and Children


 

Faith and Children

Many Christian parents face a paradox: How can some children hear the good news of the Bible and believe, while others hear the same message and remain unaffected? While the process of faith may be miraculous, it is not entirely mysterious. Jesus explained it in His parable of the sower (Matthew 13:1-23). Teaching received without understanding kills the yield. Faith with shallow roots withers and dies. Distractions, worries and desires for other things choke the Word. But one who hears the Word and understands it bears fruit.
How can we help our children receive the Word and bear fruit? Jesus' parable inspires several practical planting tips.
Focus on understanding. Many parents and teachers attempt to impart faith primarily through the transfer of Bible facts. Those seeds will not likely take root unless kids truly understand the meaning of the facts. Sunday school worksheets often use fill-in-the-blanks and word puzzles to drill children on their factual knowledge. But unscrambling the word forgiveness in a puzzle is far less important than understanding the meaning of forgiveness. Hearing is not enough. Reading is not enough. Memorizing is not enough — unless your goal is to produce a Bible "Jeopardy" champion. Concentrate your time on helping kids really understand God's Word, its relevance today and how you apply it.
Let them experience the message. People remember and are affected by vivid experiences. When Jesus wanted His disciples to learn about servanthood, He got down on His knees and washed their feet. You can be sure those disciples never forgot that faith lesson! You can do the same with your children. For example, to help them experience the concept of grace, involve your family in giving to others without expecting anything in return. Or to encourage kind words as mentioned in Ephesians 4:29, invite family members to write or draw a kind note to one another. (For more ideas on teaching through experiences, visit Heritage Builders.)
Use teachable moments. Typically, when your kids are enveloped in emotion-packed situations, they are the most ready to grow. When circumstances provoke feelings of fear, sadness, anger, exhilaration, awe or wonder, be prepared to help them see how God is working. When Johnny is scared may be the opportune time to teach about God's presence. Jesus took advantage of teachable moments often, such as during the storm on the lake and with those who threatened to stone the adulterous woman.
Reinforce for long-term retention. Some information we quickly forget. Other things we remember a lifetime. We can help move more of God's message into long-term memory through "interval reinforcement," review or use of the message repeatedly over time. If the brain registers information just once, less than 10 percent of the message is likely to be remembered after 30 days. But if there are six exposures to the information over 30 days, 90 percent of the message is likely to be retained. If you want your kids to understand God as Creator, repeat the message frequently — when you drive through the mountains, when you witness a sunset, when you visit the zoo and when you marvel at the intricacy of the human body.
Avoid bribes. Many well-intentioned parents and teachers attempt to grow their kids' faith through the enticement of rewards. "Learn this verse and get a ribbon." "Go to Sunday school and get a cookie." It may seem harmless, but bribing kids actually sets up a distraction. The "do this and get that" approach causes kids to focus more on the "that" than the "this." Jesus never said, "If you do unto others what you want them to do to you, you get a lollipop," or "If you feed My sheep, you get a Twinkie."
Employ delight. Your kids will learn more when they enjoy the process. Make learning about God fun! Some parents and teachers wince at this suggestion. Few people gain a love for anything that is marinated in drudgery. No one ever accused Jesus of being dull or boring. In fact, consider His first miracle: turning water into wine for the wedding at Cana. And remember how He told Peter to find cash for the temple tax — go catch a fish and pull a coin from its mouth. Delightful! So, make faith learning delightful.
Jesus concludes His parable: "The one who received the seed that fell on good soil is the man who hears the word and understands it. He produces a crop, yielding a hundred, sixty or thirty times what was sown" (Matthew 13:23). What crop are you plotting with your kids?
 
 

 

6 Ways to Make Your Marriage Happy


6 Ways to Make Your Marriage Happy

by Drs. Les & Leslie Parrott

Our closest friends flanked the concrete steps of our church as we made our way to the waiting car adorned with the obligatory "Just Married" sign. We couldn't have been happier. After seven years of dating — through most of high school and all of college — we were a married couple. Finally.
After a romantic honeymoon on the Oregon coast, we moved to Los Angeles for graduate school. A tiny apartment, little more than a single room, became our new home. We'd spend our weekdays in classes and study until bedtime. No television. Barely any furniture. We watched every penny. We'd occasionally splurge on a couple of burritos at the corner taco stand. Life wasn't exactly easy. But all that didn't matter. We were in love. And we were happy — until we weren't.
Little did we know that shortly into our so-called happy marriage, we'd be in couples counseling trying to, well, be happy. After all, wasn't marriage supposed to do that for us? And if marriage wasn't making us happy, was there something wrong with us? Had we made a huge mistake?
Truth be told, happiness is in short supply for too many couples. And the reason, we suspect, is that they don't work at it — or more likely, they don't know how to work at it. Happiness, after all, is not something that happens; it's something you make.

Isn't marriage supposed to make us happy?


Once we find our perfect partner, we'll have a lock on happiness, right? That's what we thought. And with good reason: The notion has some truth. Marriage does make us happy. The problem is that marriage will not make us as intensely happy — or for as long — as we believe it should. Studies reveal that the happiness boost from marriage lasts an average of only two years.
Unfortunately, when those two years are past and fulfilling our goal to find the ideal partner hasn't made us as happy as we expected, we often feel there must be something wrong with us or we must be the only ones who feel this way. But we're not. It's the common course of love. And if left unattended, if we're not deliberately "making happy" together, our relationship suffers.
So what's a couple to do? How do you make happy together? The answer is found in understanding just what happiness is.

What is happiness?


Happiness comes in two forms. Both result in feelings of satisfaction, but each has a different shelf life:
"Feel-good happiness" is the momentary sensation of pleasure. For example, when we joke around or have sex, we experience feel-good happiness. But here's the catch: We know from research that feel-good happiness is ruled by the law of diminishing returns. This type of happiness can lose its punch, and it rarely lasts longer than a few hours at a time.
"Values-based happiness" is a deeper sense that our lives have meaning and fulfill a larger purpose than just pleasure. It represents a spiritual source of satisfaction. And here's some good news: It's not ruled by the law of diminishing returns. This means there's no limit to how meaningful and happy our lives can be. Some like to call values-based happiness joy because it's deep and more abiding. That's fine with us. Whatever you call it, it's found in our values.
For the uninformed, happiness becomes less about a well-lived life and more about experiencing the well-felt moment. That's a dead end. True happiness requires meaning and values to accompany our feelings.

Must we be unhappy?


Our circumstances account for only about 10 percent of our happiness. In other words, being relatively healthy and having a job that pays enough money to meet our needs are circumstances that contribute to our overall happiness, but keep in mind this is only 10 percent.
A more significant factor is our "happiness set point." It has to do with our genes. Researchers have found that 50 percent of our happiness is determined by our biology. Turns out that some brains are happier than others. We sometimes call it temperament. And we're more or less stuck with it.
If our happiness set point is on the low end, making us less happy than others, are we doomed to stay that way? Hardly. The remaining 40 percent of our happiness is within our control.
Thankfully, lasting happiness does not lie mainly in increasing our set point or improving our circumstances. A significant portion of our happiness comes down to the choices we make.

How can we boost our happiness?


We've combed through all the scientific studies we could find on happiness to identify the best of what works to make and maintain happiness in marriage. And we've settled on a half dozen happiness boosters that are sure to move the needle in your relationship. These are the six dials we know couples can turn to get the best results:
Count your blessings. Nothing can increase happiness more quickly in a relationship than shared gratitude. Taking the time to conscientiously count your blessings together once a week significantly increases your overall satisfaction with life.
Try new things. Falling into a routine, or even a rut, is easy. But that is a killer to happiness, so you've got to shake it up. If you're itching to "buy" some happiness, spend your hard-earned cash on experiences. Go out for a nice meal. Go to the theater or bungee jump. Buy an adventure rather than an object.
Dream a dream. The moment a couple quits looking to the future together is the moment they become vulnerable to dissatisfaction. So picture the life and love you see for yourselves, and talk to each other about what you see.
Celebrate each other. We all applaud the big things, but it's the little and unexpected celebrations that can make or break a couple's happiness. For example, listening to a favorite song activates parts of the brain that trigger happiness, releasing endorphins similar to the ways that sex and food do. A mini celebration ensues. Why not put a little playlist together for just the two of you?
Attune your spirits. The soul of every husband and wife hungers for deeper connection and a greater sense of shared meaning, and when it's found, happiness abounds. According to sociologist W. Bradford Wilcox of the University of Virginia, married couples who attend church together tend to be happier than couples who rarely or never attend services.
Add value to others. When a husband and wife do good beyond their marriage, happiness envelops their relationship like never before. Together, make a list of at least 50 actions you can take to demonstrate kindness beyond your relationship.

Does God want us to pursue happiness?


We understand the sentiment that "making happy" is a selfish pursuit. After all, some silly and downright selfish things are done in the name of pursuing happiness. Many a marriage counselor will attest to hearing something along these lines: "I'm not happy in this marriage; God wants me to be happy; therefore I want out of this marriage."This self-centered perspective is mistaking hedonism for happiness. They are pursuing pleasure at the cost of meaning. Don't fall for this lie. You'll find more happiness in giving yourself away than in any self-centered pleasure.
Our longtime friend Gary Thomas, author of Sacred Marriage and many other books, is well-known for asking the question: "What if God designed marriage to make us holy instead of happy?" How could it be otherwise? The pursuit of holiness can't help but bring an abiding happiness and joy. Why? Because holiness, being devoted to God's ways of being, subsumes meaning and love. And true happiness is never fulfilled without it.
Happy people are more loving people — the very opposite of selfish. True happiness makes us more sociable and self-giving. It improves our ability to resolve conflict. The bottom line: Happiness makes us more loving and lovable.
Even Jesus said, "These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full" (John 15:11). So is valuing happiness selfish? Not if it's the kind of happiness that balances feelings with values. Healthy happiness, infused with meaning, makes us easy to live with. And that makes for a happy marriage.

Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott are New York Times best-selling authors and the founders of the Center for Relationship Development at Seattle Pacific University. This article is adapted from Making Happy: The art and science of a happy marriage, published by Worthy Publishing, © 2014 Drs. Les & Leslie Parrott.

This article appeared in the October/November 2014 issue of Thriving Family Copyright © 2014 by Les & Leslie Parrott. Used by permission. ThrivingFamily.com.

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Jumat, 03 Oktober 2014

GREAT QUOTES OCTOBER 2014

More GREAT QUOTES
-Sermonindex

"If the doctrine of Christian union is true, then division and
sectarianism are a great and prodigious evil"
-D.S. Warner

"There seems to be a notion abroad that if we talk enough and pray
enough, revival will set in like a stock market boom or a winning
streak on a baseball club. We appear to be waiting for some sweet
chariot to swing low and carry us into the Big Rock Candy Mountain of
religious experience... a kind of benign miracle, a feverish
renaissance of religious activity that will come upon us, leaving us
morally as we are now, except that we will be a lot happier and there
will be a great many more of us...."
- A. W. Tozer

"We all profess that we are bound for heaven, immortality, and glory:
but is it any evidence that we really design it if all our thoughts
are consumed about the trifles of this world, which we must leave
behind us, and have only occasional thoughts of things above?"
-John Owen

True prayer MUST be aflame."
-- E. M. Bounds

"Prayer is not so much an act as it is an attitude-an attitude of
dependency, dependency upon God."
-Arthur W. Pink

"Fix even the smallest amount you purpose to give of your income,
and give this regularly... If you neglect in habitual giving, a regular
giving, a giving principle based upon Scriptural grounds, and leave
it only to feeling and impulse, or particular arousing circumstances,
you will certainly be a loser."
-George Mueller

Live Blog From Catalyst ’14 – 17 Leadership Quotes And Lessons From Robert Madu

Live Blog From Catalyst ’14 – 17 Leadership Quotes And Lessons From Robert Madu

As a member of the Catalyst Blog Team and INJOY Stewardship Solutions, I will be bringing you live updates from the much anticipated Catalyst Conference in Atlanta, GA.  The theme for this year’s conference is Change Is Coming.
Today’s final session was conducted by Robert Madu, Teaching Pastor of Trinity Church in Manhattan.  The following are 17 Leadership Quotes and Lessons from this amazing session from Hebrews 12:
  1. Many leaders cannot run the race set before them because they have their eyes on the lane beside.
  2. Who are you racing? Who are you racing according to their pace?
  3. If you preach from your weakness you’ll never lack for material to preach.
  4. Comparison is the #1 destructor of destiny.
  5. Comparison is the thief of joy. It is the cancer to contentment.
  6. Comparison will consistently cloud the clarity of Gods call on your life.
  7. We need leaders who don’t approach what they do as career but a calling.
  8. A career is what you get paid to do. A calling is what you were made to do.
  9. Stop complaining to the Master about the pieces you didn’t get and start praising God because you are a masterpiece.
  10. If the Bible says you’re good looking ain’t nobody can tell you you’re ugly.
  11. If the brightness of the blessing blinds you to the Blesser it becomes a curse.
  12. Goliath is big enough to eat hay and dumb enough to enjoy it.
  13. Comparison is the beginning of the end.
  14. Comparison always starts with “But me”.
  15. “But me” people can’t celebrate success.
  16. Our computers have become mirrors to see how we measure up to someone else.
  17. God has given you grace to run your race.
The following are the list of all Day 2 speakers at this year’s Catalyst Conference:
Also, before reading, make sure you check out the announcement from INJOY Stewardship Solutions shown below about a FREE webinar I will be conducting on October 16th for churches needing to raise capital in 2015.  Now onto Robert’s thoughts:
More leadership insights to come throughout the day.

Jumat, 05 September 2014

QUOTES

More GREAT QUOTES

"Study the history of revival. God has always sent revival in the
darkest days. Oh, for a mighty, sweeping revival today!"
- Adrian Rogers

"I read of the revivals of the past, great sweeping revivals where
thousands of men were swept into the Kingdom of God. I read
about Charles G. Finney winning his thousands and his hundreds
of thousands of souls to Christ. Then I picked up a book and
read the messages of Charles G. Finney and the message of
Jonathan Edwards on 'Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God,'
and I said, 'No wonder men trembled; no wonder they fell in the
altars and cried out in repentance and sobbed their way to the
throne of grace!'"
- Leonard Ravenhill

"The spiritual disciplines of 2 Chronicles 7:14 are not just conditions
for a true revival; they are the revival itself!"
- Lewis Drummond

"In the Irish Revival of 1859, people became so weak that they
could not get back to their homes. Men and women would fall by
the wayside and would be found hours later pleading with God to
save their souls. They felt that they were slipping into hell and that
nothing else in life mattered but to get right with God... To them
eternity meant everything. Nothing else was of any consequence.
They felt that if God did not have mercy on them and save them,
they were doomed for all time to come."
- Oswald Smith

"A spiritual awakening is no more than God's people seeing God
in His holiness, turning from their wicked ways, and being
transformed into His likeness."
- Lewis Drummond